TAG – Five Flaming Hotties

I was tagged by blogger MIB (of MIB’s Instant Headache) to participate in the Five Flaming Hotties blog game thingymabob. So here are the rules as that’s a requirement and I don’t want a kitten to die or something if I don’t post them:

– Mention the name of the blog you were tagged by, as well as the creators of this game Realweegiemidget Reviews and Thoughts All Sorts, linking back to all blogs involved and including the picture above.
– List five of your greatest hotties from TV and/or film, i.e. crushes/objects of your affection, including musicians or sports stars too.
– Tell us how you were “introduced” to them and why you like them/what appeals.
– Add some appealing pictures.
– Tag seven bloggers for their Five Flaming Hotties.
– Post the rules.

Well, I’m not going to tag people but anyone who reads this is free to participate if they choose to do so. What can I say? I’m more of a dog person anyway. 😉

I must confess that I’m old and not exactly full of lust for any famous people anymore (other than Chris Hemsworth). And, lately, it seems like we’re finding out that a bunch of them are disgustingly horrible people (although we probably suspected that already), which makes doing a list like this even more difficult. I’m already thinking “Oh man, I listed The Cosby Show as one of my favorite TV shows in an old post on this blog as well as posting a Kevin Spacey Top Ten. Am I going to have to go deleting old posts now that we’re finding out that Hollywood is nasty???” I’d probably have to lose half my blog content. Just make good movies & be good people, dammit!

Okay – I’ll pick five hotties & I sincerely hope that they’re nice people in real life. Because, although it sounds like bullshit, what turns me on the most is 1) Someone who is genuine & honest and who can be trusted (my biggest pet peeves are arrogance, phoney people & backstabbers) 2) Someone with a great sense of humor and 3) Someone with a brain and common sense (number three seems especially hard to find these days). I also like laidback people who aren’t full of drama. Fucking chill, people! I feel like the world is completely fucking insane at the moment. Seriously – I’m struggling to do this post because I’m too annoyed lately to be able to do something lighthearted & fun like this.

Okay. Shut up, woman! Let’s just do this Hotties thing. I contemplated putting both men & women in this list as I find a lot of women very beautiful although I’m not attracted to them. But I’ll stick to men since that’s my thing. Unless they’re assholes – I’m not one of those girls who likes the mean guys. Instant turn off!

Wait. You know what? I’ve changed my mind. I’m going to list fictional movie characters I like based on personality as well as looks. I need to know a guy isn’t an asshole before I can decide if I actually find him attractive and that’s the honest truth. Fictional characters can’t let me down! Lloyd Dobler will forever be nothing but a sweetheart. So here we go…

5. Jake Ryan in Sixteen Candles. Played by Michael Schoeffling.

As far as looks only, Jake Ryan was my ideal hunk as a teen. Brown hair, brown eyes, perfect face (although, looking at him now, he seems a bit too “handsome dull”). He’d have been higher on this list at one point but, although he was sweet to the nerd girl, his personality was a bit “handsome dull” as well. I’m also pretty sure that Jake Ryan was a meathead jock getting by on a C average and he didn’t seem to have much of a sense of humor. So, he was really only “nice” & “handsome”. There’s not enough going on besides the good looks but I’d be lying to myself if I excluded him from this list. All girls my age had a huge crush on the completely unattainable Jake Ryan. (Because, honestly – there’s no fucking way that a “Jake Ryan” would like the quiet nerd girl in real life).

4. Lloyd Dobler in Say Anything. Played by John Cusack.

THE perfect (and, of course, fictional) boyfriend. And, unlike Jake Ryan, he felt much more realistic. It felt like he could be MY boyfriend. But Lloyd Dobler holding that damn boom box over his head ruined boys for me throughout my teens & early twenties. No one could actually match up to that. I know there are some very nice guys in the world but I certainly wasn’t surrounded by any in late 80s/early 90s Midwest America. My school had no Lloyd Doblers! We had asshole versions of Jake Ryan (minus the insanely handsome thing).

3. Kyle Reese in The Terminator. Played by Michael Biehn.

Where the hell can a girl find a cute, sensitive virgin willing to risk his life and travel into the past to save her from a killer robot? Is that really too much to ask? We all deserve a Kyle Reese! And a Dwayne Hicks who will try to protect us from aliens even though we’re kick-ass ladies who can protect ourselves from those bitches…

2. Mark Hunter (Hard Harry) in Pump Up The Volume. Played by Christian Slater.

Hard Harry was one of my absolute biggest movie crushes when this movie came out. I wanted to be Samantha Mathis in this movie & to make-out with sweet, shy, sensitive Mark BUT, at the same time, I identified more with Mark and wanted to be a female version of his quiet teen who came out of his shell while raising hell as an unknown pirate DJ.

Honorable mention: Christian Slater’s Adam in Untamed Heart. Where can I find a sensitive boy with a baboon heart who brings me Christmas trees?!?

1. Chris Hemsworth. In anything & everything. Played by a hot Australian.

Okay, sorry. He’s not fictional. But he’s so damn pretty. Look at him!!! I could stare at him all day. I’m so shallow. I was pretending I’m not shallow! To be fair, he seems like a nice guy. Like most people, I watch enough celebrity interviews to get an idea of what these celebrities are like (there are plenty I can’t stand). Hemsworth seems very laidback & is always sweet about his family. So I’ll assume he’s perfect and nice and funny (not sure about brainy, though?). And, as a bonus, he’s FLAMING HOT! 🙂 Oh, here’s my Thor: Ragnarok review. I sooooo love funny Thor…. ❤️🔥

My Top Ten Diane Lane Movies

Happy (belated) Birthday to Diane Lane, who turned 51 on January 22nd. I’ll be honest – I never really noticed Diane Lane that much when I was younger as she was mostly in movies that were just a little bit too old for me. Heck, I’ve only just watched Streets Of Fire and The Outsiders for the very first time this past year! Shame on me.

I think that I first started paying attention to her after the movies Unfaithful and Under The Tuscan Sun. Although I’m not normally into movies aimed at “middle-aged women” (even though I AM one), I think I just really appreciated how sexy the late-thirties Lane was in those films. And she’s still gorgeous at 51! Hollywood has always been obsessed with youth, especially when it comes to actresses, so I love seeing those such as Lane still in the acting game.

I decided to fully explore her older films after watching and thoroughly enjoying the obscure Ladies And Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains. So I’ve now seen just over ten of her films, which means that two not-very-good ones are included at 9 & 10.

So here are My Top Ten Diane Lane Movies, counting down to my favorite film (not ranked by performance. no, I’m not saying I prefer her as a cartoon – number 1 is just an excellent film). 😉

10. Man Of Steel

9. Jumper

8. The Perfect Storm

7. Under The Tuscan Sun

6. Streets Of Fire

5. Unfaithful

4. Ladies And Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains

3. The Outsiders

2. Chaplin

1. Inside Out

My Top Ten Actors’ Eyes

Err… Would this actually be a Top 20???

Abbi of Where The Wild Things Are once again did a couple Top Tens that I’d like to rip off. 😉 Her lists of her Top Ten Most Annoying Actors & Actresses (as well as the actors & actresses she’d watch in most everything) have now been copied by pretty much every one of us movie bloggers on WordPress. Well, a while ago Abbi got the idea from Cindy Bruchman’s Mr Bright Eyes Top Ten list of blue-eyed actors to then do her own list of Top Ten Blue Eyed Actors followed by her Top Ten Brown Eyed Actors.

Well, I’m mixing it up a bit! If I had to pick, I’d say brown eyes are what do it for me the most but I do love some sexy blue eyes as well (hello Chris Hemsworth!). So I’m putting both in one list.

Here are My Top Ten (Twenty!) Actors’ Eyes:

10. Jesse Williams

Whenever I’m not watching Grey’s Anatomy because it’s full of moany wankers, I always think “Damn! That guy has some lovely eyes.” But then I think “Not that I would know, since I totally don’t watch that annoying Grey’s Anatomy bullshit. Umm. It must be The Cabin In The Woods I’m thinking of. Yep, that’s where I saw him. Not Grey’s Anatomy. I don’t watch that shit. Honest!”

9. Orlando Bloom

I wouldn’t say I have a big crush on Bloom but his brown eyes are perfect. I could have put either Orlando Bloom or Andrew Garfield at number nine as they both have the perfect type of brown eyes that make me melt but I went with Bloom as, well, he’s definitely the more attractive of the two.

8. David Bowie

That’s me – once again using any excuse to get David Bowie into a post. 😉 I’ve always been quite fascinated by people who have eyes of different colors (even though, in Bowie’s case, it’s down to a childhood accident). It’s just another quirk that makes him unique.

7. Paul Walker

Aww – poor Paul Walker. I wasn’t a fan of those silly testosterone-fueled Fast & Furious movies but I loved Walker’s baby blues. It was a shame he’d done so many of those movies – I’d have liked to see him in other things. You know what movie of his I really liked? Roadkill! (Called Joy Ride in the US. Isn’t it weird when they change movie titles??)

6. Johnny Depp

Another crush from my teen years who had beautiful brown eyes. I can’t help it… the majority of guys I had crushes on through my teens just always seemed to have brown eyes! Holy shit, though – look at the size of that collar.

5. Paul Rudd

Sweet, funny, adorable Paul Rudd. I’ve loved him since Clueless. Cute AND funny – that’s how I like ’em! Love his slightly unusual greenish eye color.

4. Chris Hemsworth

Those who know me know that I kind of have the hots for The Hems. He’s gorgeous from top to bottom anyway but having eyes that are such a perfect shade of blue certainly doesn’t hurt either.

3. Jim Sturgess

I told you I liked brown! Don’t get me wrong – Hemsworth is still my number one crush. Jim Sturgess, however, has THE most perfect puppy dog brown eyes. This is the type of boy I’d have fallen desperately in love with as a teenager (and who would’ve broken my heart, of course. the bastard!).

2. Paul Newman

Back to blue! Okay, Chris Hemsworth is gorgeous but Paul Newman beat him to “baby-blue-eyed sex symbol” fame. What a legend! What a face. What a hottie!

1. Michael Schoeffling

Ha! Yes, Jake Ryan from Sixteen Candles. What can I say? Jake Ryan topped my list HERE of My Top Ten Movie Crushes. As your biggest crushes are when you’re in your teens, a lot of the guys on that list are of course from my teenage years. Jake Ryan was the perfect guy to me back then (in a totally shallow looks-wise way). So I have to put the lovely Michael Schoeffling’s beautiful brown eyes at number one.

Green Eyes & The Ladies:

It feels like I should mention some actresses as well, such as Elizabeth Taylor, whose eyes were a deep shade of blue that sometimes appeared violet and who was lucky enough to be born with a “mutation” of a double row of eyelashes!! (I had never heard that until I looked people up when putting this list together). Also, seeing as I have neither blue nor brown eyes, I felt like I should give a shout-out to all the AWESOME green and hazel-eyed people out there. There are lots of beautiful green-eyed actresses but not actors for some reason. I read that green eyes are more common in women but that was somewhere on the Internet and the Internet is full of LIES, so… Who knows! Anyway, here are a few actresses with lovely eyes (yeah, mostly green as green-eyed girls rock):

Evangeline Lilly
Scarlett Johansson
Angelina Jolie
Emily Browning
Charlize Theron
Melanie Laurent

And the most amazing eyes I’ve ever seen belong to actress Àstrid Bergès-Frisbey, who was specifically hired for the (great) movie I Origins, a film in which the plot revolves around the eyes and their mysteries. I wondered throughout the movie if they were faked but they’re indeed her actual eyes with the unusual markings and different colors. Gorgeous!

Thor: The Dark World (2013) Review

Thor: The Dark World (2013)

***SPOILER FREE REVIEW***

Directed by Alan Taylor

Starring:
Chris Hemsworth
Natalie Portman
Tom Hiddleston
Anthony Hopkins
Stellan Skarsgård
Idris Elba
Christopher Eccleston
Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje
Kat Dennings
Ray Stevenson
Zachary Levi
Tadanobu Asano
Jaimie Alexander
Rene Russo

Running time: 112 minutes

Plot Synopsis:
Yada yada Odin. Yada yada Asgard. Yada yada something called Aether. Yada yada Malekith. Yada yada Rene Russo. Yada yada not much Loki. Yada yada Nine Realms. Hubba hubba CHRIS HEMSWORTH!

My Opinion:

Chris Hemsworth is rather attractive. Like, almost annoyingly attractive. Like, “it should be illegal to be that attractive” attractive. If I was a man, I’d probably want to punch that pretty face. But I’m a girl so I just want to kiss that pretty face. And those eyes! I don’t normally like blue eyes but his are so lovely! You know someone is too attractive when Natalie Portman looks really plain standing next to them. And there’s a shirtless scene close to the start of this movie where they maybe linger a bit too long on the lovely half-naked Thor (which supposedly really annoyed Hemsworth?). I had no problem with this scene….

Okay okay – That’s not from Thor. I can’t find an image from the shirtless scene but, trust me, I’ll post it when I do. You know I came through for you all in finding his bum scene from the wonderful Rush. 😉

Where was I? Oh yeah – Thor review! I got distracted. Well, it’s like my above plot synopsis. Blah blah weird names I’ll never remember blah blah Natalie Portman blah blah the necessary quick mention of S.H.I.E.L.D. thrown in there blah blah THOR! Okay – I know this all sounds like I didn’t enjoy this but I’m just exhausted and not in the right mood to do some serious review. I really liked The Dark World! I actually preferred it to the first Thor movie and it was, luckily, FAR better than this year’s other superhero films which I found extremely disappointing (Iron Man 3 & especially that OTT Man Of Steel).

I’ve said it before with other films like this but I better say it again: I know nothing about comic books. I’ve never read any so, when I watch superhero movies, I know pretty much nothing about the characters and the stories. This is nice, though, because I don’t have to worry about all that fanboy (err… fangirl) stuff where they always end up pissed off about something. I can just enjoy the movie. Or not enjoy the movie. When Man Of Steel came out, I did a list of My Top Ten Superhero Movies HERE. I may have to update the list, actually, as I think Thor: The Dark World may now be at number nine or ten. 🙂

With the first film… I dunno. I liked it but obviously they had to set up the characters and I really knew nothing about Thor and it all seemed a little weird. But now we know Thor, Loki, and Dr. Erik Selvig a bit better (especially after The Avengers) and it was easier to just sit back & enjoy the film without worrying too much about all the “blah blah Asgard yada yada” stuff. Actually, I liked seeing quite a lot of Asgard this time – I thought that would get boring. It’s lovely – especially that cool bridge thing (Um, the Bifröst? Thank god for Wikipedia!). I do love that funky bridge. And Heimdall is a cool dude.

Rene Russo was good in this and I especially liked all the bits with her but I can’t say much more without spoilers. I like the Kat Dennings character and the comic relief she provides but that might not be for everyone. Loki is underused in this one which some probably won’t appreciate but I don’t care – it’s all about Thor for me! The bad guys looked kind of cool and I liked their masks – they looked like something out of Doctor Who. And speaking of Doctor Who, I didn’t even know that was Christopher Eccleston until the credits rolled.

All in all, I just really enjoyed all the “blah blah Asgard Aether Odin Nine Realms yada yada” stuff this time! Its only flaw (for me) is Natalie Portman. Not that I don’t like her – I do! But I’ve always felt it was an odd role for her and she just doesn’t seem to “fit” plus I feel NO chemistry between her & Thor. But this is really my only complaint – I like everything else about this. Oh, and the “final battle” was much better than in the first film – the end of the first film was a bit weak. To think some of this was filmed not that terribly far away from me in England! Chris Hemsworth was so close to me. So close yet… so far… *sigh*

Summary:

Thor: The Dark World improves on the original film and I enjoyed it much more this time around now that I know all the characters a bit better. It’s a worthy addition to the superhero universe. I’m now once again looking forward to further superhero films – I’d lost hope after Iron Man 3 & especially Man Of Steel. The Dark World is funny when it needs to be, serious when it needs to be, and action-packed when it needs to be. I liked it a lot!

My Rating: 7/10

Scene After The Credits? – Of course! It’s a superhero movie! And there’s not only one but TWO. One is halfway through the credits and the other one is at the very end. So stick around and try to hold in your pee.

Reviews Of Movies I’ve Seen In 2013

Chris Hemsworth’s Butt In Rush

As Rush was such an excellent film, I didn’t feel right mentioning in my review just how hot Chris Hemsworth was in it. So here you go – Enjoy this shot of Hemsworth’s naked bum as seen in Rush. 🙂

Thor: The Dark World Director Alan Taylor Will Make The Next Terminator Movie

Arnold Schwarzenegger is committed to return in the new film… Blah blah… It’s also believed that Linda Hamilton with return. Blah blah. And… possibly Michael Biehn! Oh yeah – I like a bit of Kyle Reese. 🙂

The film is to be the first of an entire new Terminator trilogy. Read more details here: Business Insider

Ryan Gosling strips down for jail in an exclusive clip from The Place Beyond The Pines

Ryan Gosling. Half-Naked. Here you go – watch the deleted scene here: Total Film

My The Place Beyond The Pines review HERE. 🙂

Jonathan Levine’s All The Boys Love Mandy Lane Finally Gets Release Date

I posted a while back that this movie will FINALLY be coming out in the US seven years after it was first released elsewhere. I saw it in the UK years ago and, although I’m not really a fan of horror these days, I thought it wasn’t too horrible compared to all the other crap out there. And Amber Heard is a hottie.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane is set for a VOD release on September 6, followed by a limited theatrical run starting October 11.

Link to article & trailer here: SlashFilm

And Amber Heard falling out of her top a bit as Mandy Lane:

Benedict Cumberbatch Goes Shirtless In Deleted Scene From Star Trek Into Darkness

Time to even the score! 😉

Link to article: SlashFilm

My Star Trek Into Darkness Review

My Top Ten Shower & Bath Scenes In Movies – too bad I can’t add this. 😉

Star Trek Into Darkness Writer Apologizes For “Unnecessary” Underwear Scene

Hahaha! As hot as she is, you have to admit that scene with Alice Eve in her underwear was pretty pathetic. 😉

Link to article: ScreenCrush

And as there have been far too many pictures of girls in their underwear on my blog lately, here’s a half-naked Chris Hemsworth to balance things out:

And again:

And as Thor. Hello.

My Review For Star Trek Into Darkness

My Reviews For Star Trek: The Motion Picture & The Wrath Of Khan & Star Trek (2009)

Star Trek Into Darkness (2013) Review

Star Trek Into Darkness

Directed by JJ Abrams

Starring:
John Cho
Benedict Cumberbatch
Alice Eve
Bruce Greenwood
Simon Pegg
Chris Pine
Zachary Quinto
Zoe Saldana
Karl Urban
Peter Weller
Anton Yelchin

Plot Synopsis:

After devastating attacks on Starfleet, the USS Enterprise is sent on a mission into enemy territory in order to find the man responsible for these terrorist acts.

My Opinion:

I won’t go into how much I know about all things Star Trek – I already did that here when I reviewed Star Trek (2009), which I re-watched this past week, and The Motion Picture & The Wrath Of Khan, which I’ve just watched for the first time: Star Trek Reviews

Basically, I loved The Next Generation and then watched the original series after TNG & have just now started on the movies with the original cast. So, this review is from someone who likes Star Trek but is not exactly a Trekkie (or is it Trekker?).

I really enjoyed Star Trek Into Darkness. I thought the 2009 movie was a decent enough intro to a new series of movies but it didn’t really blow me away. Plus, I fell asleep both times I tried to watch it all the way through. Well, I can say you’re not likely to fall asleep during Into Darkness. 😉

I enjoyed the main characters more in this one as they were able to just kind of “be themselves” as opposed to in the first movie where they had to spend time setting them up for those in the audience new to Star Trek. It also meant they were able to spend more time focusing on the story and the action in this one – and there’s A LOT of action. It was pretty non-stop from beginning to end. I liked the opening scene (even if it was maybe a bit silly). The bits set in London and in San Francisco looked great. The emotional bits felt more “real” in this one than in the 2009 one (perhaps as we’re more used to the main actors now). Alice Eve is sexy, especially in all the different uniforms. And Benedict Cumberbatch is an EXCELLENT villain. He’s by far the best thing about this one. The only slight downside is he’s so good that it shows off the weaknesses in all the other actors in the film.

I’m reading mixed reviews of this movie now and see that some die hard Trekkies (Trekkers?!) are hating it. That’s unfortunate – I thoroughly enjoyed this but now, after seeing the first two Star Trek films, I can see why they’d take issue with certain things. To those who don’t hold the original movies so dear, I think it’s a lot easier to just sit back and enjoy the new films without overanalyzing them. To those who are pretty new to Star Trek, I can see them really liking the new films. Especially Into Darkness – I thought it was quite exciting (and much better than the first one).

My initial reaction was that Into Darkness was “fantastic” and I called it the best Star Trek film yet. Well, I stand by what I said about it being fantastic. It’s probably not the “best” one, though. I haven’t watched First Contact since it first came out but I do remember how much I loved it at the time. And I don’t think Into Darkness would EVER top The Wrath Of Khan for any big fans of the original Star Treks. So I think Into Darkness is “one of” the best films of the entire series. But, okay, yeah… I think, for its time and what it will have meant to fans when they first watched it, The Wrath Of Khan is still the “best”. It just didn’t have the emotional impact for me watching it for the first time all these years later.

Summary:

Star Trek Into Darkness is a thoroughly entertaining & action-packed film with a great villain played brilliantly by Benedict Cumberbatch, who is the highlight of the film. It’s a worthy addition to the Star Trek universe and, in my opinion, one of the best in the entire series. However, after the adrenaline wore off and I thought about the film a little more the day after seeing it, I can see some of the faults. There are minor things (Like the way Alice Eve ends up in her underwear. Yes, she’s hot. But the scene was silly). But there are a few major things as well, which I unfortunately can’t discuss without major spoilers. All in all, this film had the chance to possibly end up (almost) as much of a classic as The Wrath Of Khan. But it doesn’t manage it. None of the Star Trek films, for me, manage the depth needed to make any of them truly stunning films. And now that I’ve thought about things a bit more – Yes, The Wrath Of Khan is the one that actually came the closest to achieving the greatness that, hopefully, we’ll someday get from a Star Trek film. Star Trek Into Darkness was great fun but they’re going to need to get much more bold with the next film if they wish to ever achieve true greatness.

My Rating: 8/10

Okay okay – Here’s Alice Eve in her underwear:

Tucker And Dale Vs Evil (2010) Review

Tucker And Dale Vs Evil

Directed by Eli Craig

Starring:
Tyler Labine
Alan Tudyk
Katrina Bowden
Jesse Moss

Plot:

A comedy horror in which two “simple” but sweet hillbillies, Dale played by Tyler Labine & Tucker played by Alan Tudyk, are on their way to the “dream vacation home” (a rundown shack) they’ve just bought deep in the woods of West Virginia. While at a gas station, they encounter a group of college students who are there to do some camping. The snobby students are immediately freaked out by these “hillbillies”, especially when Dale tries to talk to one of them (Allison played by Katrina Bowden). Mistaking his nervousness at talking to a pretty girl for “maniacal hillbilly craziness”, the college students flee. Later, when the students decide to do some skinny dipping in the lake where Tucker & Dale happen to be fishing, Allison is startled & bumps her head. Tucker & Dale save her but the other students again flee, thinking they’ve kidnapped her.

What follows as the students try to “rescue” Allison from the hillbillies’ cabin are a series of hilarious deadly mishaps which further reinforce the students’ belief that the hillbillies are killers while a baffled Tucker & Dale are confused as to why these students seem to have some crazy kind of suicide pact.

My Opinion:

This was a pleasant surprise! Especially as I’ve liked very few horror movies since the 70s & 80s (The Omen & The Shining are my type of thing with a bit of the Nightmare On Elm Street-type 80s slasher). I’m even pickier on comedy – I can’t say I’ve found many movies funny since the days of Wayne’s World, The Princess Bride & This Is Spinal Tap. Yeah, I’m old & grumpy. But Tucker And Dale had me laughing throughout the whole movie. As for the “horror”, it’s harder for me to say if horror fans liked this? The gore is cheesy & the film has that very 80s look overall as that’s (I assume?) what they’re going for since it’s a send-up of 80s slasher flicks. I liked that and it worked perfectly for this film.

This movie never “tries too hard” on the comedy, which is kind of refreshing. This is NOT, I repeat NOT, one of those horrible Scary Movie movies. This was made by someone with a brain who knows that being more subtle on the comedy isn’t a bad thing and who clearly has a love for 80s slashers and can make fun of them in just the right way. It’s also clearly made by someone the same sort of age as me, though, so I think this movie probably wouldn’t appeal so much to the younger Saw generation who didn’t grow up on 70s & 80s horror movies and might not get the comedy in this. And, of course, they’d just moan at the gore looking unrealistic and cheesy. And that it’s not in 3D with blood, vomit & entrails popping out of the screen at you. Kids these days – they don’t know what’s good. 😉

Summary:

A thoroughly fun & entertaining comedy horror that lovingly pokes fun at the 80s slasher flick and the horror clichés of dumb college students doing every dumb thing possible in order to “escape” crazy inbred hillbilly maniacs. It takes what’s actually a very simple idea of having the hillbillies just be two nice guys who think that they’re actually the ones being terrorized by college kids who seem to have completely lost their minds and gives us a clever film that, in never trying too hard to please the audience, manages to do just that. However, you’re probably much more likely to enjoy this if, like me, you’re of the age where you grew up on 70s & 80s horror flicks.

My Rating: 7.5/10

All the movies I’ve seen in 2013 – Yep, Tucker And Dale comes in just under a Hitchcock film… 🙂

The Dirtiest Movie Posters of All Time

Naughty! You can check out all 40 posters here: Flavorwire. (To be honest they’re fairly tame. I’ve included four of the better ones to entice you.) 😉

My Top Ten Shower & Bath Scenes In Movies

Ever since I reviewed John Carpenter’s The Ward & happened to mention the shower scene with Amber Heard, I see variations of the search term “Amber Heard shower scene” bringing someone to my blog on a daily basis. Pervs! So, screw it – I’ll make a list! Here are my top ten movie shower (or bath) scenes starting with the best:

1. Psycho

Obviously.

2. Hardware

Such an underrated cult classic! I never know anyone who has seen this movie. And the shower scene is awesome with one of the BEST movie songs ever – The Order Of Death by Public Image Limited.

3. Carrie

Dirty Pillows!

4. American Beauty

“This will be the high point of my day: It’s all downhill from here.”

5. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

“I recall Central Park in fall.”

6. Weird Science

“If you ever get the chance, shower with them. I did. Mmm, it’s a mindscrambler. Hurts so good.”

7. A Nightmare On Elm Street

One, two, Freddy’s coming for you…

8. The Shining

All work & no play makes Jack make-out with creepy dead woman.

8. It

Argh! Pennywise! Creepy f@#king clown!!! I don’t even want this damn picture on my blog!

10. Blade

Cool bloodbath (well, more like bloodSHOWER) club scene. Set to the tune of the Pump Panel remix of New Order’s Confusion.

Honorable Mentions:
Slither
Arachnophobia
Fatal Attraction
What Lies Beneath
Pleasantville
Porky’s
Pretty Woman
The Big Lebowski
Stoker

For the guys:
Starship Troopers (I hate this movie)

Words to bring the pervs in: Hot, Steamy, Sexy, Naked, Boobies. Lol! They’ll be disappointed – my list isn’t very hot or steamy. 😉

Here’s Amber Heard wet in the shower in The Ward:

Hardware shower scene with Public Image Ltd song The Order Of Death:

Ryan Gosling Project – The Place Beyond The Pines

I’ve just seen The Place Beyond The Pines. It’s good – I really enjoyed it. Will try to write a review soon(ish) when I get the time. But I figured I should update my Ryan Gosling Project (I’m planning to watch every movie he’s been in). Here’s every Ryan Gosling movie I’ve seen ranked in order starting with my favorite:

1. Lars And The Real Girl
2. Drive
3. Blue Valentine
4. The Place Beyond The Pines
5. Half Nelson
6. The Notebook
7. Crazy, Stupid, Love.
8. The Ides Of March

It’s very close between Blue Valentine & The Place Beyond The Pines – I may change my mind on that. (I change my mind a lot).

I do have a really sad & annoying habit of ranking things from my favorite to my least favorite. So… Yeah – I’ve done that with every movie I’ve seen so far this year. Here’s the list of the ones I’ve seen in the cinema. And, again, I’m sure some of these will change position by the end of the year as I change my mind a lot. 😉

1. Django Unchained
2. Robot & Frank
3. The Place Beyond The Pines
4. Warm Bodies
5. Side Effects
6. Flight
7. Wreck-It Ralph
8. Les Miserables
9. Oblivion
10. The Croods
11. The Impossible
12. Life Of Pi
13. Trance
14. Vinyl
15. Oz The Great And Powerful

Link to full list of everything I’ve seen this year: 2013 Movies Seen

Happy Birthday to Jack Nicholson & Amber Heard

I didn’t know one of my favorite actors & my favorite girl crush shared a birthday.

My favorite Jack Nicholson movie: Definitely One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest but he’s been in lots of great ones. I think I may need to do a list of my top five Jack Nicholson movies soon…

My favorite Amber Heard movie: Zombieland

The movie where Amber Heard looks the hottest: All The Boys Love Mandy Lane

Other celebrity birthdays today:
Catherine Mary Stewart (favorite CMS movie: Night Of The Comet)
Bettie Page
Jeffrey Dean Morgan
Aaron Spelling
John Waters
Ryan Stiles
Sheryl Lee
Glen Campbell
Peter Frampton

But back to Amber Heard: she’s hot. Let’s look at some photos of her.

Seven Years Later, The Weinstein Company Rebuys and Resurrects Mandy Lane

Um, what? All The Boys Love Mandy Lane never came out in the US? I had no idea! It came out in the UK. Well, anyway, it looks like it’s now getting a theatrical release in the US (seven years later!).

Link to the full story here: Indiewire

Well, it gives me another chance to mention hot sexy Amber Heard, I guess! Since the words Amber Heard & shower scene seem to bring several people to my blog every week since my review for The Ward. 😉

As for All The Boys Love Mandy Lane, I actually thought it was one of the better horror films in recent years and am very surprised to find out that it never came out in the US. Now, I think 99% of mainstream horror films “these days” suck (meaning I’ve liked very few since the 70s & 80s other than some very good foreign ones). So I may not be the best judge on current horror but I thought this one was slightly more original than some recent ones and had that slight “cult” feel to it that I tend to go for. It’s certainly no masterpiece but I’d recommend it to any horror fans, especially of the geekier, film-loving, blogging variety (the best kind!). Hey, this has kind of turned into a mini-review.

My Rating: 6/10

Here’s a few photos from the movie. Amber Heard really was pretty in this one.

The Ryan Gosling Project

Okay, I’ve just watched The Ides Of March (will do a review sometime soon). I’ll be honest – I watched it ONLY because Ryan Gosling is in it. I mean… it’s about politics. I hate politics! But I love Ryan Gosling. Oh yes I do.

So, anyway, I was thinking that I should watch every movie that Ryan Gosling has been in (not counting TV stuff). My IMDB Top 250 Movie Challenge is still my main focus but this can be my little side project (when I need a Gosling fix). 😉 He’s not been around TOO long so it’s doable. And I don’t think I’ve loved any other actor as much as I love The Gosling (other than Johnny Depp starting back in his 21 Jump Street days but I’m finally getting over him these past few years!).

So here’s a list of Ryan Gosling movies that I’ve seen and not seen. Unfortunately, it does look like I’ve probably already seen all the best. And… Crap! Looks like I have to watch two football movies? Ugh! Worse than politics. 😛

Seen (in order from my favorite to least favorite. but all of these were good. well, except for The Notebook – that’s only that high for the rain scene if I’m going to be honest! the movie is a bit rubbish overall. only worth the watch for Ryan):

1. Lars And The Real Girl

2. Drive

3. Blue Valentine

4. Half Nelson

5. The Notebook

6. Crazy, Stupid, Love.

7. The Ides Of March

Not Seen (saw Murder By Numbers but it was so long ago I don’t remember it so will have to re-watch):

Frankenstein and Me
The Unbelievables
Remember the Titans
The Believer
Murder by Numbers
The Slaughter Rule
The United States of Leland
Stay
Fracture
All Good Things
Gangster Squad
The Place Beyond the Pines (not out yet)
Only God Forgives (not out yet)

How many people are going to moan at Drive being number two? 😉 I may change my mind on that – the top two are VERY close. Drive is cool, he’s sexy as hell in it, I love the jacket, and the soundtrack is awesome. But… it ruined Finding Nemo for me a little bit. Nemo’s dad is such a bastard! Lol!

Any recommendations on ones to start with from the not seen list? And can someone explain to me what it is about Ryan Gosling that makes him so sexy?! Because he’s not actually my usual “type”!

Hot Sexy Amber Heard

Okay – When looking at my stats I’ve noticed that people often seem to have come to my blog after doing a search for Amber Heard along with words such as hot and shower scene (this would be because I mentioned her shower scene in my review of The Ward). So… I figured I’d do an Amber Heard post again and see what happens! 😉 She really is hot and my current girl crush but I still love Ryan Gosling the most (he gets lots of hits too!). Here are two great pictures of them:

Only Ryan Gosling…

…would be able to pull off looking like a scumbag and still have me crushing on him. I mean, this is what the guys that I avoided in high school looked like! 😉 What is it with you, Ryan Gosling?! I just don’t get it! You sexy sexy man.

Nice but I slightly preferred Master Of Puppets. And I gotta say the Metallica fans at MY school looked nothing like Ryan! I might have hated high school less if they had… 😉

Only The Gosling could wear those stupid trousers.

Even hotter with a baby.

Smoking. Icky habit. But oh so sexy in THIS mouth.

For anyone who doesn’t actually know, these photos are from the movie The Place Beyond The Pines, which will be released in the UK on April 12th. I’ll watch it. But only because of Ryan.

Here’s an old favorite. Again – only The Gosling could look good in glasses.

The Rum Diary

Okay – I watched this because of Johnny Depp. I’ve loved him since his 21 Jump Street & A Nightmare On Elm Street days.

I was bored out of my mind! It’s one of those movies where I fell asleep halfway through and could barely be bothered to finish it the next day. Sorry!

And I’m less in love with Johnny Depp these days. Too many dodgy movies in recent years, I think. Gotta say I’m more into Amber Heard now. 😉 I can’t be bothered to really review this movie – Let’s just look at a few pictures of her in The Rum Diary…

My Rum Diary Haiku:

Johnny Depp is old
I don’t know what’s going on
Amber Heard is hot

My Rating: 5/10

John Carpenter’s The Ward

Just watched John Carpenter’s The Ward. Probably only because I have a bit of a girl crush on Amber Heard… But, seriously, this movie is meant to take place in 1966? I don’t think you could find an actress who looks LESS like a girl from 1966!

Anyway, I wasn’t exactly expecting a masterpiece. And I certainly didn’t get one! But I was hoping it would be a bit better than it was. The MOST disappointing thing is that I already saw this EXACT same movie in 2003! I can’t say which one as it would then completely give away the plot of The Ward but let’s just say that one did a slightly better job of telling the exact same story. This one just stuck some hot chicks in there to make things more interesting. And a shower scene. Amber Heard was probably hottest in the shower scene:

So… If you go for movies with girls in mental wards, I’d recommend either Sucker Punch (SO many things wrong with that movie and it’s not exactly “good” but it’s a fun & entertaining guilty pleasure) or The Uninvited. Both starring Emily Browning. Maybe I have a girl crush on her too. 😉

4/10 for The Ward

Watch these instead:

The Uninvited is a remake of a South Korean horror movie called A Tale Of Two Sisters which I’d always wanted to see. Didn’t know The Uninvited was a remake of it when I watched it. Should really watch the original now.

Ryan Gosling – What is it with this dude?

I’m a girl, in my 30s, therefore I should like Ryan Gosling. And I do! But why?? I can’t quite figure it out. He’s not my type. I tend to go for brown hair & brown eyes and that “boy next door” pretty face. I’m not one of these girls who goes gaga over The Notebook (it made me gag a bit but I must admit that a passionate kiss in the rain would be awesome). It wasn’t until seeing Lars & The Real Girl that I started falling in love with Ryan Gosling (GREAT movie – highly recommend it!). Then came Drive and Crazy, Stupid, Love. Wow. How sexy is Ryan Gosling in those movies? I don’t get it! What is it about this guy? And I kind of hate myself for liking a guy that every other girl seems to go for – I’m usually not that mainstream! 😉 At least I can say this – who, exactly, is Channing Tatum and where did he suddenly come from and why on earth should I find him sexy?? But back to Ryan Gosling – I just thought I should share a link that’s been around for a while now but I must admit I go back to every now & then:

Rub Ryan Gosling. Enjoy.

Drive Angry

Meh. Pretty bad. Sometimes there’s just not much more you can say about a movie. 😉 But Amber Heard is definitely hot.

4/10