Dope, Comet & Me And Earl And The Dying Girl Movie Reviews

Three mega quickies for three movies I watched last year. I have a lot of these old reviews to catch up on so I’m going to keep these threesomes short. Here we go!

Dope (2015)

Directed by Rick Famuyiwa

Starring: Shameik Moore, Tony Revolori, Kiersey Clemons, Kimberly Elise, Chanel Iman, Tyga, Blake Anderson, Zoë Kravitz, A$AP Rocky

Plot Synopsis: (via IMDB)
Life changes for Malcolm, a geek who’s surviving life in a tough neighborhood, after a chance invitation to an underground party leads him and his friends into a Los Angeles adventure.

My Opinion:

I couldn’t wait to see this and the hubby & I immediately watched it the second it turned up on Netflix (or whichever service it was) instead of our usual “What should we watch?” deliberation which goes on for so long that we could watch an entire movie in the time we spend deciding what to watch. Probably one of the biggest disappointments that I’ve watched recently, I enjoyed very little about the movie Dope other than the fantastic soundtrack (which was great but also more predictable than I was hoping for). I think I’m just finally getting too old for certain teenage/twentysomething shit? Especially the quirky “indie-type” ones that try too hard (the next two are even more guilty of that than Dope).

I didn’t exactly hate this movie but no matter how many great artists you use in a film (Public Enemy! A Tribe Called Quest! Eric B. & Rakim!) it can’t disguise the fact that the story is weak & silly and only a couple of characters are likable. Shameik Moore is easily the best thing about the movie (after the music) so at least there was one character I cared about. Zoë Kravitz is also a decent character (with a much smaller role than I thought she’d have). Unfortunately, everyone else is an obnoxious asshole and the two “funny” best friends just annoyed me. Also, I suppose I’m showing my age & small town hickness but the only teenage parties I knew in the Eighties were, to quote Heathers, “keggers with kids”. Give me cheap beer in a field & some cow tipping! I can’t relate to you kids & your weird drugs. Okay – I’ve never actually tipped a cow. That seems cruel. Skip this movie & buy the soundtrack if you don’t already know all the songs. BUY the soundtrack. With actual money. That’s also how we did things in the old days!

My Rating: 6/10

Comet (2014)

Directed & Written by Sam Esmail

Starring: Emmy Rossum & Justin Long

Plot Synopsis: (from IMDB)
Set in a parallel universe, Comet bounces back and forth over the course of an unlikely but perfectly paired couple’s six-year relationship.

My Opinion:

What a load of pretentious bullshit. Feel free to give this one a go if you want to spend an hour & a half watching millennials whining about their first world relationship problems. Oh! And if you like that sort of thing, you’re really in for a treat since we get to see this couple whining in several slightly different scenarios since their relationship is shown in alternate realities. So clever!

I admit that I fell for the “parallel universe” thing in the synopsis so I put this on since I’m a sci-fi nerd. Don’t be fooled like I was! AVOID!!!!!! Do yourself a favor and go watch Arrival if you’re wanting a proper sci-fi drama. Or go watch anything other than this. Hell, just go watch a Nicholas Sparks movie if you’re wanting a bullshit melodramatic romance. At least you know what you’re gonna get with Nicholas Sparks movies since they don’t pretend to be anything other than silly & predictable. Hell, at least Nicholas Sparks characters usually have some goddamn chemistry unlike the two boring fuckers in Comet. And, most importantly, Nicholas Sparks movies know they’re stupid. Comet thinks it’s smart. You’re not smart just because you throw a “parallel universe” angle into a film to try to make it less boring. Comet is just a Nicholas Sparks movie minus any chemistry whatsoever between the characters and minus any good sex scenes.

My Rating: 4/10

Me And Earl And The Dying Girl (2015)

Directed by Alfonso Gomez-Rejon

Based on Me and Earl and the Dying Girl by Jesse Andrews

Starring: Thomas Mann, Olivia Cooke, RJ Cyler, Nick Offerman, Molly Shannon, Jon Bernthal, Connie Britton

Plot Synopsis: (via IMDB)
High schooler Greg, who spends most of his time making parodies of classic movies with his co-worker Earl, finds his outlook forever altered after befriending a classmate who has just been diagnosed with cancer.

My Opinion:

I’m sorry this threesome is turning into a bitchathon. I’m also sorry to say that I was very disappointed with Me and Earl and the Dying Girl. But, this time, I’m not exactly sure why since this is the type of movie that’s usually my sort of thing.

I like plenty of indie movies (whether they’re the true definition of indie or just the hundreds of wannabe indies nowadays – I’m too lazy to look into whether this was an actual independent film or not). But they can either be brilliant or they can cross that line into pretentious bullshit (like the movie Comet, which stays over that line the entire time). I think the problem with MAEATDG (stupid long title) is that it crosses that line just a little too much for me to have truly bought into it. It tries just a little too hard to be unique. And, once again, I found that I just didn’t like the characters very much. Why is it so difficult to make likable or, at least, interesting and/or memorable characters? With the sad setup to this story, I expected to feel at least a slight emotional attachment to someone. At least the dying girl, right?? We didn’t seem to get to know her well – we mostly spent time with the mopey boy who’s at first pretty much forced to befriend her when she’s diagnosed with cancer. We did have the added bonus of the two boys making amateur films, which is a big YES to us movie nerds watching. It was indeed fun to see bits & pieces of their spoofs of classic films but it didn’t make up for the fact that I didn’t really care about anyone and just found the film surprisingly slow & unengaging. There’s a slight redemption at the end as I liked the presentation of the final film made by our main character and the overall movie itself ended well (as in, it ended how I expected it to and I think it was handled well). MAEATDG was certainly not a bad film. I have respect for everyone involved in its making & can understand why it would have fans. Unfortunately, for whatever reason, it just didn’t resonate with me. And I actually feel kind of bad about that! I’m sorry I didn’t like it that much.

My Rating: 6/10


Fun Size (2012) Review

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Fun Size (2012) (aka Half Pint)

Directed by Josh Schwartz

Victoria Justice
Jane Levy
Thomas Mann
Chelsea Handler
Thomas McDonell
Osric Chau
Johnny Knoxville

Running time: 86 minutes

Plot Synopsis:
Wren is made to babysit her little brother on Halloween, ruining her plans to go to a Halloween party. When he goes missing while trick-or-treating, Wren and her friends must find him before her mom finds out.

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My Opinion:

Wasn’t quite sure what to expect with this one. It has a very low IMDB rating (5.3), which it doesn’t really deserve. I looked into this a bit & apparently a lot of the hatred comes from angry parents as this is a Nickelodeon movie & it’s a bit too racy for their liking. Okay, fine – I can see that. But I don’t have some pre-teen kid so I don’t care about that. I’ll review this based only on what I thought of it myself. Hell, the Disney Channel gave us all Miley Cyrus – I’d let a kid watch Fun Size every day for the rest of his/her life before I’d let them see two seconds of Miley Cyrus doing whatever that is she does now. Chill, parents. I saw movies far racier than Fun Size when I was a pre-teen.

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Basically, Fun Size is like a really wholesome version of Project X (which I wasn’t crazy about as that was a bad Weird Science rip-off – review HERE). I actually had a bit of fun with Fun Size. If you go into it knowing it’s the Nickelodeon version of a classic “teen movie” but aimed at a younger age than my beloved John Hughes teen movies, you might find you enjoy it as a lazy weekend afternoon sort of movie. Or at Halloweentime as it’s set at Halloween.

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The main girl (above) is cute & sweet and a perfectly fine role model for any pre-teen girls watching. She has decent storylines going on with a boy she likes and of course another boy who likes her, her messed-up mother, her crazy (and really funny) little brother, and her father who has died before this film takes place (with something revealed about him at the end which I quite liked). Her best friend is a bit of a Miley, though. But, hey – we all had a slut friend in school! Here she is, dressed as a slutty cat looking for some action at the Halloween party. She was the most annoying character:

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The brother is nuts & doesn’t speak & is funny as hell – he provides us with the most entertaining bits of the film, probably. I found some of the humor actually not too bad for a modern pre-teen (and Nickelodeon!) type of film – I think those who made this may have another very funny movie in them without the restrictions that were probably placed on them to not go TOO far with any slightly naughty humor. Yes, that big chicken does hump the car like was shown in the trailer if you’ve seen it:

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Lol. Saucy! So immature. But kind of funny.

The story is predictable as hell but… Who cares? What movie isn’t, especially ones for this age group? Chelsea Handler as the mother is, believe it or not, right for this role. She can be annoying as hell and was awful in This Means War but this role was perfect for her (and she’s even likeable by the end). The romance(s)? So predictable! Who cares? It’s a bit of fun. It’s a movie for pre-teens who like to see big chickens humping cars.

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A perfectly fine little “teen” comedy aimed more at the pre-teen crowd than actual teenagers. It’s a little confused as to what it wants to be: slightly racy teen comedy or wholesome Nickelodeon film. But it’s just a bit of fun and really not deserving of all the hatred it received from parents who thought it stepped over the line with its ever-so-slightly racy humor. These parents should maybe take a step back & think about the movies THEY watched when they were 11/12. Fun Size is far more tame than the teen films of my youth. And the little brother cracked me up!

My Rating: 6.5/10

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