Splinter (2008) & Escape Room (2019) Reviews

Splinter (2008)

Directed by Toby Wilkins

Starring: Shea Whigham, Paulo Costanzo, Jill Wagner, Rachel Kerbs

Plot Synopsis: (via IMDb)
Trapped in an isolated gas station by a voracious Splinter parasite that transforms its still-living victims into deadly hosts, a young couple and an escaped convict must find a way to work together to survive this primal terror.

My Opinion:

Was recommended this one (thanks, Film Miasma!). Didn’t really know anything about it but think I may have avoided it at the time as the poster looked so nasty and I’m a wuss with really gross stuff. Well, it is pretty gross to be fair. But it’s kind of borderline body horror gross in that sort of fake-looking way that I like from old Cronenberg movies so I was fine with this.

The characters are also strong, which is important to me (especially as horror movie characters are so often rubbish & hateful). We even have a baddie who ends up not being such a baddie after all & I liked that. And the girl is pretty kick ass. It’s also mostly set in one place while they’re trapped in a gas station by this weird, um, parasite thing and I’m always impressed with movies that manage to stay interesting in pretty much just one location. Thought they did a good job with this film.

My Rating: 6.5/10

Escape Room (2019)

Directed by Adam Robitel

Starring: Taylor Russell, Logan Miller, Deborah Ann Woll, Tyler Labine, Nik Dodani, Jay Ellis, Yorick van Wageningen

Plot Synopsis: (via Wikipedia)
The film follows a group of people who are sent to navigate a series of deadly escape rooms.

My Opinion:

I enjoyed this, even though it was a bit f*^king ridiculous. Especially the very end, but most horror movies like these have stupid endings. I don’t know what to say about this… It’s the usual sort of shit but at least it has a fun idea & the different escape rooms the characters find themselves in are entertaining. And I liked some of the characters, especially the two girls.

When it comes to horror, I lower my expectations a lot as most modern horror sucks. I prefer the classics from the ’70s & ’80s. There have been some good ones in recent years, though (The Babadook, It Follows, and especially the delightfully bonkers Mandy which is very much my type of thing). But the good ones are rare so I’m happy to watch these lightweight & utterly predictable ones to pass the time in between the good ones. This was a bit like the recent Countdown and both have a Final Destination vibe (though not as good as that one, of course).

Whatever. I actually quite liked this. The characters were decent & the story was entertaining. I expect nothing more from this sort of thing.

My Rating: 6/10

Tucker And Dale Vs Evil (2010) Review

20130511-081111 PM.jpg
Tucker And Dale Vs Evil

Directed by Eli Craig

Starring:
Tyler Labine
Alan Tudyk
Katrina Bowden
Jesse Moss

20130511-081143 PM.jpg
Plot:

A comedy horror in which two “simple” but sweet hillbillies, Dale played by Tyler Labine & Tucker played by Alan Tudyk, are on their way to the “dream vacation home” (a rundown shack) they’ve just bought deep in the woods of West Virginia. While at a gas station, they encounter a group of college students who are there to do some camping. The snobby students are immediately freaked out by these “hillbillies”, especially when Dale tries to talk to one of them (Allison played by Katrina Bowden). Mistaking his nervousness at talking to a pretty girl for “maniacal hillbilly craziness”, the college students flee. Later, when the students decide to do some skinny dipping in the lake where Tucker & Dale happen to be fishing, Allison is startled & bumps her head. Tucker & Dale save her but the other students again flee, thinking they’ve kidnapped her.

What follows as the students try to “rescue” Allison from the hillbillies’ cabin are a series of hilarious deadly mishaps which further reinforce the students’ belief that the hillbillies are killers while a baffled Tucker & Dale are confused as to why these students seem to have some crazy kind of suicide pact.

20130511-081235 PM.jpg
My Opinion:

This was a pleasant surprise! Especially as I’ve liked very few horror movies since the 70s & 80s (The Omen & The Shining are my type of thing with a bit of the Nightmare On Elm Street-type 80s slasher). I’m even pickier on comedy – I can’t say I’ve found many movies funny since the days of Wayne’s World, The Princess Bride & This Is Spinal Tap. Yeah, I’m old & grumpy. But Tucker And Dale had me laughing throughout the whole movie. As for the “horror”, it’s harder for me to say if horror fans liked this? The gore is cheesy & the film has that very 80s look overall as that’s (I assume?) what they’re going for since it’s a send-up of 80s slasher flicks. I liked that and it worked perfectly for this film.

20130511-081312 PM.jpg
This movie never “tries too hard” on the comedy, which is kind of refreshing. This is NOT, I repeat NOT, one of those horrible Scary Movie movies. This was made by someone with a brain who knows that being more subtle on the comedy isn’t a bad thing and who clearly has a love for 80s slashers and can make fun of them in just the right way. It’s also clearly made by someone the same sort of age as me, though, so I think this movie probably wouldn’t appeal so much to the younger Saw generation who didn’t grow up on 70s & 80s horror movies and might not get the comedy in this. And, of course, they’d just moan at the gore looking unrealistic and cheesy. And that it’s not in 3D with blood, vomit & entrails popping out of the screen at you. Kids these days – they don’t know what’s good. 😉

20130511-081350 PM.jpg
Summary:

A thoroughly fun & entertaining comedy horror that lovingly pokes fun at the 80s slasher flick and the horror clichés of dumb college students doing every dumb thing possible in order to “escape” crazy inbred hillbilly maniacs. It takes what’s actually a very simple idea of having the hillbillies just be two nice guys who think that they’re actually the ones being terrorized by college kids who seem to have completely lost their minds and gives us a clever film that, in never trying too hard to please the audience, manages to do just that. However, you’re probably much more likely to enjoy this if, like me, you’re of the age where you grew up on 70s & 80s horror flicks.

My Rating: 7.5/10

20130511-081422 PM.jpg

All the movies I’ve seen in 2013 – Yep, Tucker And Dale comes in just under a Hitchcock film… 🙂