Project X (2012)

Hmm. Not sure where to start with this review.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m of the age where I grew up with and am a lover of 80s teen movies, especially the John Hughes ones. So I’m probably just too old to enjoy Project X. Through the whole thing I kept thinking to myself “Would I think this was the greatest movie EVER if I was a teenager right now?”. Well, I’m sure I’d like it a bit more but I still don’t think it would be a favorite.

I think it’s fair to say that I do still love teen movies. When they’re actually good… My favorite film of 2012 was The Perks Of Being A Wallflower. Since the year 2000, I also liked Juno, Charlie Bartlett, Nick And Norah’s Infinite Playlist, and Scott Pilgrim. Okay – so from that list I obviously don’t go for the ones that are TOO mainstream & vulgar but I have nothing against those if they’re good or at least funny (yes, I like the American Pie movies and, shamefully, Harold & Kumar!). So it’s not because of anything vulgar or the (completely expected) loads of naked titties that made me not able to really get into Project X.

I don’t know where to go with this review now. I think it’s because I find it a lot harder to review “meh” movies than really good or really bad ones. This movie was meh. The characters were bland & I couldn’t relate to a single one of them in any sort of way (the main guy wasn’t too bad but his obnoxious friend was obnoxious in an unfunny and annoying way instead of in an entertaining Stifler way). The “funny” bits weren’t funny (other than maybe the “ball puncher”) and, quite frankly, the vulgar bits probably weren’t vulgar enough. And… This was meant to be a “found footage” film, right? Lol! I think they kept forgetting that they were meant to be filming it in that way.

I’ve spent too long on this. It’s not a really BAD film. I think it would have been much more enjoyable if they’d had better main characters – I think weak characters let the movie down more than anything.

Rating: 6/10

Watch these movies instead – the makers of Project X obviously did:

For a better “destroy dad’s car” movie:

For a better “kick ass flamethrower” movie:

For better “jump off the roof mostly into pools” movies (well, the first more than the second):

For a better drunken “destroy your parents’ house” party movie (the obvious biggest influence on Project X – I kept expecting a missile to come up through the house and for mutant bikers to show up):

For a better “gnome” movie:

But I do want this gnome for my garden…

And, finally, for a better movie of the same name:

It’s 2:00 am…

…I need to sleep!

The Karate Kid (2010)

I of course like the original Karate Kid because of the age that I am (not gonna say EXACT age!). 😉 I’m a sucker for all 80s movies but especially any “teen” ones. Although I know that movie is far from perfect, it has some classic scenes (wax on wax off, the chopsticks/fly thing, etc). I get warm fuzzies just thinking about it.

So I was of course pissed off when I found out that they were remaking The Karate Kid. Argh! I’m SO sick of the lack of original ideas for movies these days! I don’t understand the remake thing, especially when the original movie was good enough. I mean, seriously- are they gonna remake Ferris Bueller’s Day Off next? The Breakfast Club? If they touch those I swear I’ll go completely mental.

But now that my little rant is over I have to say this: Damn! The Karate Kid remake was surprisingly good! I don’t think it had any of the “classic moments” that the original had but it was a good solid movie with decent performances and likeable characters and something I’d happily let my kid watch if I had one who was 11 or 12.

Jackie Chan was good, Jaden Smith was good (dammit. I hate Hollywood nepotism! but he’s been really good in movies so far & something about him is quite likeable!), and I thought the relationship between mother and son was good. And the bad kid was an evil little bastard – I wanted to punch him in the face so he obviously did a good job too. And there were some nice funny moments (another chopsticks/fly thing). I liked how they made it different enough from the original for it to feel like a new movie & not a complete waste of time like most remakes. It was great that it was set in China & I actually think it worked well being aimed at a younger audience with the kid being 12 instead of a teenager in high school.

The Karate Kid remake will obviously never live up to the original for me but it’s a good solid family movie in its own right and good family movies are quite rare (i’m talking about ones aimed at the 8-12 range that don’t assume all kids are idiots and that both the kids AND the parents can enjoy – last one like that was Real Steel).

6.5/10

My Top Disney Princess Movies

1. Sleeping Beauty
2. Beauty And The Beast
3. Cinderella
4. Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs
5. Tangled
6. The Princess And The Frog
7. Brave
8. Aladdin
9. The Little Mermaid
10. Mulan
11. Pocahontas

In order starting with my favorite. These are ranked according to how much I like the movie overall, not according to the best princess. That list may differ slightly but I’m a grown woman and not sad enough to do another list. (Belle would be first!). 😉 These are all the “official” princesses including Merida, who will soon also be officially added. Thanks to whoever photoshopped her into the picture I found online!

This Week’s Movie Quote

Wayne Campbell: “Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.”

Wayne’s World (1992)

Music for my walk to work

Had to work off some of the Xmas chocolate so I walked to work. Maybe I should make a good walking playlist… These are what popped up. I have to say the 28 Days Later soundtrack is awesome and was actually good for walking – I felt like I was being chased by people with a zombie-like virus.

My 2012 Movie Round-Up

I’m only including the ones I went to in the cinema in 2012, not ones watched on DVD. In order from my favorite to least favorite:

1. The Artist – 9/10

This counts as I saw it in the cinema in January 2012. I’m in the UK so we’re usually a little behind on movies (much to my annoyance). 😉 Excellent, beautiful, moving movie without a bunch of unnecessary noise and with really cool shoes & clothing. I wanted to somehow crawl into the screen and live in this movie.

2. The Perks Of Being A Wallflower – 8.5/10

Can’t fully put my finger on it but really loved this movie. Already reviewed it on here so won’t go into it much again but I think it’s just because I really felt I could identify with the characters and wished they’d been MY group of friends in 1991, when the movie takes place (and when I was actually the same age as them!). Reading the book now.

3. Ted – 8.5/10

I’m not much of a “comedy movie” person. Not because I don’t have a sense of humor but because NOTHING is funny these days! Maybe I’m just too old and out of touch since I haven’t found anything funny since Wayne’s World, The Princess Bride & This Is Spinal Tap. But, holy crap -Ted was freaking hilarious! Thank you god! A funny movie! Finally! Or… Thank you Seth MacFarlane. Whatever. 🙂

4. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey – 8/10

I saw this four days ago and still need to do a review of it. I’m still trying to decide exactly what I think of it, though. I’m a big fan of the book and of course The Lord of the Rings books & movies. Is it as good as any of The Lord of the Rings movies? Unfortunately, no. But did I enjoy it like I was a small child opening Christmas presents? Hell yeah. 🙂

5. The Dark Knight Rises – 8/10

I’m pretty geeky (for a girl) and should be more into the Batman films than I am. Maybe it’s because I don’t like Christian Bale. Or because I just really couldn’t get into Batman Begins. The Dark Knight, however, was brilliant. All because of Heath Ledger for me (and many people, of course). So The Dark Knight Rises was never going to live up to that one but I still enjoyed it thoroughly and thought it was a good conclusion.

6. Untouchable – 8.5/10

It’s the French Shawshank Redemption. But not set in a prison. And one guy is in a wheelchair. And there’s comedy unlike in Shawshank. And it’s a true story. And, you know – they speak French. But, otherwise, it’s Shawshank! And considering that The Shawshank Redemption is the best film of ALL TIME, it means this movie is pretty damn good as well. Seriously, though, this is a very touching true story about male friendship between two people who are very different. It should probably be above The Hobbit and The Dark Knight Rises, to be honest. Not above the vulgar teddy bear but, still, I highly recommend this!

7. The Hunger Games – 8/10

Love love love the books. (Well, the first two at least). They did a decent job adapting the book. Of course things had to be left out and there wasn’t near as much character development but that’s to be expected (unless it’s done by Peter Jackson who would manage to make a short book 20 hours long). At least they didn’t change TOO much. And I think Jennifer Lawrence is perfect for the role.

8. Skyfall – 8/10

I should start by saying I’m not a Bond fan AT ALL. I’ve only seen maybe five Bond films and not one of those was even a Sean Connery one (Seriously! I’m so ashamed). So, as a non-Bond fan just enjoying a film where I’m not fully up on all I should know about the main character, I thought this was a great movie. I loved the emotion and serious nature of it and don’t think I’d go for the older, more light-hearted ones anyway. They’re more light-hearted, right? I should probably just shut up and watch some of them as I don’t know what I’m talking about. 🙂

9. The Avengers – 7.5/10

Superheroes! Lots of them! Yay! Chris Hemsworth! BIG yay! Fun popcorn movie! Yay! Oscar worthy? No, but who cares! I’d have to say I probably prefer the Iron Man movies so far. But Chris Hemsworth isn’t in those…

10. Looper – 7.5/10

This movie is very ME. I love sci-fi. I love time travel. I love Joseph Gordon-Levitt since 500 Days Of Summer (in a little brother kind of way). I had very high expectations so that probably didn’t help me being slightly disappointed. Plot holes (but when aren’t there in time travel movies?) and… something else that was missing from this movie (don’t know what!) brings this much further down the 2012 list than I was hoping it would be. It started out with almost Blade Runner-type potential. But, damn – it ended up being nowhere near the classic that is. My fault for wanting another Blade Runner masterpiece, probably! It was still a fun movie, though.

11. Prometheus – 7/10

Argh! I’m so upset! This was meant to be number ONE this year! This was meant to be a CLASSIC like the absolutely brilliant Alien & Aliens! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!!! But I can’t put it any further down the list or give it a lower rating than this because… Well, because of Alien & Aliens! Argh! Damn you, Prometheus! Damn you! (But, really, people were a BIT hard on Prometheus, don’t you think?) :-p

12. The Muppets – 7/10

The Muppets! And Amy Adams. Good enough for me! 🙂

13. Chronicle – 7/10

Getting a little bored with the “super powers” thing but felt this was a pretty good and fairly original take on it. And sick of found footage! But it worked well with this movie.

14. Brave – 7/10

Pixar! I worship Pixar!!! Was therefore really hoping that Brave would be much higher than this. Still a much better animated movie than anything not done by Pixar, though! (Except Despicable Me) 🙂 And still much better than the Cars movies, the only Pixar movies I don’t love. And Merida is a good addition to the Disney Princess merchandising mania.

15. Argo – 7/10

Probably deserves a higher rating but it all felt a little “flat” to me. For an extremely interesting and emotional true story, I wasn’t feeling the emotion for some reason. Plus, I think I have a thing against Ben Affleck. Love the story, though.

16. The Cabin in the Woods – 6/10

It’s definitely a love it or hate it. Saying that, though, I’d say I just found it average so I’m full of shit. But, hey – Chris Hemsworth again! He’s worth at least one additional point on the rating scale.

17. Snow White & The Huntsman – 6/10

This was better than I was expecting and I think it could have been even better if it hadn’t been for one HUGE mistake. Kristen Stewart! SO SO SO wrong for this role! Know who WAS perfect in this movie, though? That’s right – Chris Hemsworth! Oh yeah.

18. The Amazing Spider-Man – 6/10

Not actually that bad, but… What’s the point?? Do prefer Andrew Garfield to Tobey Maguire, though.

19. Frankenweenie – 6/10

Tim Burton – I’ve fallen out of love with him in recent years. This was better than some of his recent stuff. But it worked better as a short.

20. The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists! – 5.5/10

Meh

21. The Woman in Black – 5.5/10

Boo! *yawn*

22. The Descendants – 5.5/10

Why all the hype? Sideways was much better.

23. Red Lights – 5/10

My friend chose this. I’m never letting her choose the movie again.

24. Tinker Bell & the Secret of the Wings – 4.5/10

I SO didn’t choose this. And I already spent WAY too much time reviewing this in a separate post.

25. Sinister – 4/10

WTF?

26. Ice Age 4 – 4/10

The first three aren’t TOO bad (for non-Pixar movies!). They should have stopped at three.

New Books For Christmas

Got some books for Christmas that I’d been wanting to read. Going to start with The Perks Of Being A Wallflower. Absolutely loved the movie so figured I’d check out the book as well. 🙂

Also got the following books. Wish I had more time to read than I do! I’ve decided I’m going to make more use of my local library in 2013 as well:

Merry Buscemi Christmas

We survived the Armageddon! Merry Christmas, you cretins. With love from Mr Pink.

The Hobbit

Yes! Seen it! 🙂 A little busy with the Christmas thing, though, so probably won’t be doing a review for a few days!

John Carpenter’s The Ward

Just watched John Carpenter’s The Ward. Probably only because I have a bit of a girl crush on Amber Heard… But, seriously, this movie is meant to take place in 1966? I don’t think you could find an actress who looks LESS like a girl from 1966!

Anyway, I wasn’t exactly expecting a masterpiece. And I certainly didn’t get one! But I was hoping it would be a bit better than it was. The MOST disappointing thing is that I already saw this EXACT same movie in 2003! I can’t say which one as it would then completely give away the plot of The Ward but let’s just say that one did a slightly better job of telling the exact same story. This one just stuck some hot chicks in there to make things more interesting. And a shower scene. Amber Heard was probably hottest in the shower scene:

So… If you go for movies with girls in mental wards, I’d recommend either Sucker Punch (SO many things wrong with that movie and it’s not exactly “good” but it’s a fun & entertaining guilty pleasure) or The Uninvited. Both starring Emily Browning. Maybe I have a girl crush on her too. 😉

4/10 for The Ward

Watch these instead:

The Uninvited is a remake of a South Korean horror movie called A Tale Of Two Sisters which I’d always wanted to see. Didn’t know The Uninvited was a remake of it when I watched it. Should really watch the original now.

The Fighter

Felt like watching a “quality” movie tonight so went with The Fighter.

Great performances. I’m not a Christian Bale fan AT ALL but he was very good in this. I like Amy Adams a lot – it was good to see her in a different sort of role as I’m more used to her as a cheesy Disney princess in Enchanted. Mark Wahlberg gave a solid performance as well – I just always see him as Mark Wahlberg in everything… I probably liked him most in Ted. (Great movie!) 😉

I’m a girl so a movie about something I’m not at all interested in (boxing? ugh!) was probably never going to be a favorite. I can understand why this movie did so well as the actors all did a very good job but I can’t help but compare it in my mind to The Wrestler. That was also a movie about a sport I’m not at all interested in (wrestling? ugh! actually- all sports- ugh!) but I loved that movie. Mickey Rourke was SO good in that. I felt more for his character than for those in The Fighter even though The Fighter was based on a true story.

So, The Fighter was an interesting true story with some very good performances but I don’t think it’s one that will stick with me for long.

7/10

What should I watch tonight??

First Blood, Cowboys & Aliens, In Time, The Fighter, Moneyball, John Carpenter’s The Ward, or Thank You For Smoking??

We’re Not Worthy!

One of the many classic scenes from Wayne’s World. Love it! 🙂

Wayne Campbell: So, do you come to Milwaukee often?

Alice Cooper: Well, I’m a regular visitor here, but Milwaukee has certainly had its share of visitors. The French missionaries and explorers were coming here as early as the late 1600s to trade with the Native Americans.

Pete: In fact, isn’t “Milwaukee” an Indian name?

Alice Cooper: Yes, Pete, it is. Actually, it’s pronounced “mill-e-wah-que” which is Algonquin for “the good land.”

Wayne Campbell: I was not aware of that.

Norwegian Wood

In a Beatles mood! Listening to my favorite song right now. 🙂

Norwegian Wood lyrics:

I once had a girl
Or should I say she once had me
She showed me her room
Isn’t it good Norwegian wood?

She asked me to stay
And she told me to sit anywhere
So I looked around
And I noticed there wasn’t a chair

I sat on the rug biding my time
Drinking her wine
We talked until two and then she said
“It’s time for bed”

She told me she worked
In the morning and started to laugh
I told her I didn’t
And crawled off to sleep in the bath

And when I awoke I was alone
This bird had flown
So I lit a fire
Isn’t it good Norwegian wood?

My Top Five Christmas Movies

1. Scrooged
2. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
3. It’s A Wonderful Life
4. A Christmas Story
5. A Christmas Carol (with Alastair Sim – Scrooge as it’s called in the UK)

This was hard – I have six favorites. Also love the original Miracle on 34th Street. And of course love all the TV specials like Charlie Brown Christmas & The Grinch & Rudolph. Should have put the classics like It’s A Wonderful Life at the top of the list but had to be honest with myself – I never go without watching the first two every December. 🙂

Tinker Bell and the Secret of the Wings

Needless to say, I did NOT choose this movie. 😉 Hmm… How to review something that’s not my kind of thing…?

Ok. I’ve been forced to watch Tinker Bell and the Lost Treasure many times. Secret of the Wings is a bit better. As for other Tinker Bell movies, I’ve not seen them so can’t compare it to them.

I find Tinker Bell an annoying character. Let’s be honest – she’s a horrible, moody little thing in Peter Pan! But they needed spinoff movies to make more money so they’ve made her a much nicer character than she originally was. She’s no longer homicidal but she still has her moody moments.

In Secret of the Wings, she’s possibly the most likeable she’s been. Don’t know if the story is a secret but she meets someone important and I suppose the story is quite sweet. There are spring fairies (I think? Think she’s a spring one) and there are winter fairies and they can’t go into each other’s worlds. Why? Because their wings can break from getting too cold (or, vice versa, too warm). WTF? Sounds stupid, yeah? Yeah- I thought that was pretty pathetic.

The look of the movie was quite nice, I guess. Was good seeing “winter” for a change.

Holy crap. I’m spending WAY too long on this. To sum up: Plot is pretty rubbish but the story is fairly sweet & Tinker Bell is nicer than usual and the introduction of a new character is pretty good. And winter is pretty. Um. Yeah.

One cool thing about these movies is that Tinker Bell is voiced by Mae Whitman, who has starred in some way better movies! (such as The Perks of Being a Wallflower & Scott Pilgrim). And, since I was bored, I decided this male winter fairy was kind of hot. For a cartoon fairy in a crappy movie… Check him out in the background:

Wow. Yeah. I’ve spent way too long on this review.

4.5/10

My Top Ten Stephen King Movies

1. The Shawshank Redemption
2. Stand By Me
3. The Shining (even though Stephen King hates it)
4. The Green Mile
5. The Mist
6. IT
7. Pet Sematary
8. Carrie
9. The Dead Zone
10. ‘Salem’s Lot

Damn – had to leave out The Running Man. It was close! And Silver Bullet, which I probably only like because one of the two Coreys is in it. And Misery. And Maximum Overdrive which I probably only like for the soundtrack. I’ll shut up now.

(Anyone who doesn’t like The Shawshank Redemption ain’t right in the head…) 😉

If you want to sing out, sing out

Listening to a little Cat Stevens to chill me out a bit as I’m feeling very angry. This song almost always cheers me up. It also helps that it’s in a movie I adore – Harold & Maude. 🙂

Lyrics:

Well, if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free, be free
’cause there’s a million things to be
You know that there are

And if you want to live high, live high
And if you want to live low, live low
’cause there’s a million ways to go
You know that there are

Chorus:
You can do what you want
The opportunity’s on
And if you can find a new way
You can do it today
You can make it all true
And you can make it undo
You see ah ah ah
Its easy ah ah ah
You only need to know

Well if you want to say yes, say yes
And if you want to say no, say no
’cause there’s a million ways to go
You know that there are

And if you want to be me, be me
And if you want to be you, be you
’cause there’s a million things to do
You know that there are

Chorus

Well, if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free, be free
’cause there’s a million things to be
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are

Take Shelter

Been wanting to watch this for a while. I’m obsessed with movies that are at ALL apocalyptic or post-apocalyptic in any way. These days it’s zombie movies that I especially love. Maybe there’s something wrong with me or I just really hate humanity – I think it actually started with that (admittedly awful) Night of the Comet movie I watched in 1984. Or possibly a bit earlier as I loved the original Twilight Zones from a VERY young age and a couple of my favorites were The Monsters are Due on Maple Street and the one where the neighbors all fight over the bomb shelter when they think the world is ending. So, anyway – Take Shelter was close enough to those things I love for me to check it out even though I KNEW it was actually a story about mental illness. But, dammit – some more actual storms would have been good!! 😉

Decent enough performances from all involved but nothing too stunning. I did like the parallels of mental illness/approaching storm. The pacing was a bit too slow at times (I found my mind wandering several times but that’s getting to be more of a problem in my old age plus I have a lot on my mind at the moment AND I was watching it while decorating the damn Xmas tree). 🙂 And I like the ending but I always love a good ambiguous ending that you KNOW people are going to fight about on websites like imdb. Seriously – I think I just like to see movie geeks get all worked up insisting that THEIR interpretation of a movie is the only correct one. 😉 What I love about those endings is that you can take them any way YOU choose to.

So, overall, Take Shelter was a decent enough movie exploring mental illness in a slightly more interesting way by using the symbolism of the storm and the shelter and blah blah blah. But I felt it was missing something. I don’t know what exactly but I was a little bored throughout it. The feel & pacing & exploration of the characters kept reminding me of the movie Another Earth, which I enjoyed much more and I felt did a better job of getting its point across (exploring human emotion as opposed to mental illness and the effects it has on the sufferer & those close to them). And a similar sort of ambiguous ending! Hey ho. 🙂

My Rating: 6.5/10

(And since I mentioned it, I’d probably give Another Earth a 7.5/10)

Hostile Christmas

Listening to Pantera’s F**king Hostile while I decide if I want to go to the company Christmas party next week with people I don’t actually like very much. 😉 (I’d like to point out that I’m not really much of a metalhead anymore and haven’t listened to this song since 1992 – it just seemed like the appropriate song for my mood today). 🙂

My Top Five Tarantino Directed Movies

1. Kill Bill
2. Reservoir Dogs
3. Inglourious Basterds
4. Pulp Fiction
5. Death Proof

Django Unchained looks amazing from the trailers – wondering if it’ll end up very high on this list. Can’t wait to find out.